Friday, January 12, 2007

Last night I had a dream about Ben Stiller and a dwarf starring in a feel-good zombie plague movie. It was an unusual dream for me. I have zombie dreams regularly, a couple of time a year, and they're usually all about anxiety.

This one was sort of charming, actually. It makes me want to write the script. I'd make the dwarf the brains of the operation. Cause dwarves are cool.

I love zombie plague flicks, but the whole premise of them is totally flawed. Or at the very least, the Night of the Living Dead style premise is. Zombies are slow and stupid. They're not that much stronger than living people, as far as I can tell from intensive studies of the source material. Their strength is numbers. Seriously, could there be that many intact corpses that would pose a threat to able bodied humans with acess to long hitty things? Fire pokers, for god sakes, liberally applied, would put a stop to your average Romero-ian zombie. Fire extinguishers. Morgue locker doors would take care of most of the initial outbreak. Organized groups would take care of the rest. Viola, no more zombie mess.

Return of the Living Dead postulates a much more useful scenario, such that there is an initial vector of infection that produces zombies from able bodied living people, which makes for a much more tolerable ratio of menacing dead to able bodied human defenders. Plus, RotLD zombies are smart and quick. More like ghouls than zombies.

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